Dialouges in photo shoots

"Look at that wall"

"that one?"

"Yes...good, now smile just a little...good..."

"Can i look at the camera?"

"well...not really neccesary...please...look at that wall again...good...now don't smile but don't frown either...neutral..that's it...good..."

5 mins later

"Wow, this one is nice! that one too!"

"Yes...i would prefer this one"

"Yeah...wow! thanks! you took such beautiful pictures of me."

"Well, if you are not pretty, i can't make you look pretty. there's only so much I can do"

"Oh no, really, you are good"

"You know, no matter how good I am, I can't change an elephant into a mouse"

"hahaha"

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"What we need, is a picture of this person, a very nice pretty looking picture of this person smiling"

"Ok. Can i take a look at some recent pictures of this person?"

"Yes, sure. here."

".....right....(damn, she's fat)....and how do you want me to make her look?"

"Well...just a very nice pretty picture...make her look slim...you know...make her beautiful"

"...hhmmmm...make her look slim? how slim?"

"Well, as slim as you can. you know I have seen those photoshop tricks pictures, they can do wonders."

"actually may i suggest something esle?"

"Yes, what would you suggest?"

"I suggest you find someone esle for this job"

"C'mon, XXX, help me out here man. I only trust you man"

"hey, YYY, I am not trying to play punk with you or think that I am some really great guy, but that kind of DI (digital imaging) work, is really not what I am good at."

"Oh...i am sure you can. Last time you made ZZZ look so good"

"Sigh...if you give me an elephant, I cannot photograph it into a mouse."

"hahaha...aw...."

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(a dream i had last night)

"ok, sir, please stand here and let me check..."

"you checking the light only now?"

"oh, we have to check the light everytime"

"that's fantastic, you don't change your light's position, your subject always stand at the same place, what's there to check in your lights?"

"...you are a photographer?"

"yes"

"haha...well i just want to be sure"

"......."

"ok, here we go...and today we will make you look handsome"

"handsome?"

"yeah...like andy lau"

"hey...please don't. I know i am not handsome...so dun make me look handsome"

"...oh...dun worry man...i..."

"for someone who wants to impress me with a light meter, i have to worry. please just photograph me as me, look, i am a photographer too."

"yeah...we always try to make the subjects look nicer"

"no, no, no, please, have some respect for my mum who bore me into what I am, dun make an elephant into a mouse"

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